In this column, The Cheeky Charmer is joined by their new girl to discuss all things sex and feeling good


I’ve been seeing my girl for a few weeks now (see previous columns) and it’s been incredible. We’ve had amazing dates and it’s been a beautiful journey getting to know her inside the bedroom and out. Plus, she’s not fucked it up yet 🤷‍♀️ But obviously there’s still time (so don’t get ahead of yourself “potential Mrs. CC”)*

*We all know if anyone’s going to fuck it up, it’ll be the CC.

With Valentine’s three days away and couples thinking all things “boom-chicky-wah-wah” (I’ll stop now 🙄), let’s talk “bedroom confidence”.  Given that “potential Mrs CC” (we’ll call her Rose) absolutely schooled me in all things sex, it seemed right to seek her superior knowledge.

We put our heads together (which was dangerous given the lips-to-lips proximity) and discussed how to  dazzle a new paramour with some banging* bedroom moves.

*See what I did there?

CC: When I said this was about bedroom confidence, you said…

Rose:  I don’t do bedroom confidence, I do bedroom prowess (laughs evilly) * 

*My cards are marked, pray for me.

CC: What does bedroom confidence mean to you?

Rose: It makes me think of a new encounter. It encapsulates a range of different things you want to convey to someone new. How you put your best foot forward … or your best foot up in the air (giggles)*

*CC bites down on block of wood.

CC: Or wherever you wanna put your foot…

Rose: Yeah

CC: I’m not into that by the way. I haven’t got a foot fetish, or anything.

Rose: Me neither. But sometimes when your foot is in the air, it means  other things are happening…

(CC bites wood in half).

CC: For me, bedroom confidence is about knowing your sex animal.  

Rose: Ummm what?

CC: Well, as you know I’m an animal in bed! And the animal I am most like is a tiger monkey.

Rose: (Bursts out laughing) A tiger monkey?

CC: Yeah, you know – part swagger, part play.

Rose: That’s actually pretty accurate. Although I thought you were a shark (see previous column).

CC: Oh that’s just for hitting on girls. Once I got you into bed the shark clocked off and the tiger monkey moved in.

Rose: Right…

CC: What I mean is, play is important. Some people aren’t playful, its business, it’s transactional. You may as well be a human dildo. 

Rose: (Laughs) Are you a tiger monkey or a human dildo?

CC: I’m not sure anymore…

Rose: Lots of people have that transactional approach. I think the first thing is figuring out what you like, then who the other person* is and do you like who you are in that dynamic.

*She’s talking about their #SexAnimal – CC).

CC: That’s so important: how someone sees you in a relationship. It can make you feel really good, or it can make you feel  belittled. The way someone sees you either fills you with confidence or knocks it. You can feel empowered by the way they see you.

Rose: Right, and I think that maybe that’s the… (clasps hands excitedly)

CC: Maybe that’s the thing! Is that it? Did we have an “aha moment”?

Rose: Yes! Bedroom confidence isn’t just the confidence you bring into the bedroom but the confidence  you instil in the person you’re in the bedroom with.*

*Oooooh She’s good, she’s a keeper, this one.

CC: I love that!

Rose: And that’s how you get to bedroom prowess!*

*Which is a whole other level people. Even the CC hasn’t ascended those dizzying heights. My sex animal probably needs to evolve into something with wings first…

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