Don’t just ignore them until it’s too late


There is a lot of talk about relationship red flags – things that pop up at the beginning of a relationship, that we tend to ignore until it’s too late. In hindsight, we realise the signs were there all along and vow to pay attention to them next time. In online dating, some of the red flags can actually be seen waving in the wind from before you even make contact with the person. Others can be spotted soon afterwards, before or just after the first date. Here are a few such red flags that should make you stop and think before you go any further.

Her profile is far too long

Women do tend to write more than men and we do pay attention to what’s said, too. On the other hand, if someone weighs in at 500 words of ramblings, it could mean she has way too much time on her hands or is a bit desperate to find someone. It could be a sign that she’s likely to be rather needy and may want to get things moving too quickly.

She mentions past relationships in profile

Anyone who includes baggage in her profile must be suffering from serious baggage issues. There is no room for that sort of thing in what is meant to be all about looking ahead into a brighter future. If someone mentions her ex then that should make alarm bells go off in your head straight away.

There are too many negatives in her profile

We all know what it’s like to be repeatedly contacted by unsuitable people, but if someone starts translating that into a curt list of women she doesn’t want to meet, it may mean you’re dealing with someone who’s judgemental and fussy, not to mention potentially vain.

Appears needy in messages and texts

Interaction should be a two way street. If you’re both head over heels for each other and feel the need to text or email constantly, that’s great. But if you’ve just made contact and she’s already all over you with heaps of emails, texts and messages without you having reciprocated in kind, then you may well have a problem. It won’t be long before she’s suggesting you move in together after the first date.

Disappearing acts

On the other hand, if things seem to be going well but your girl is constantly disappearing for days without explanation then it may be a sign that she’s not as committed to your potential relationship as you are. Most people need time to themselves, especially at the beginning of a relationship, but there’s a fine line between alone time and potential “seeing someone else and keeping my options open” time.

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