13 must-try pleasurable ways to stimulate your clitoris

We asked a queer sexologist to offer up her sexpert advice

BY SOFIE ROOS, IMAGE BY PIXELSHOT VIA CANVA

The clitoris is the only organ made entirely for sexual pleasure, which means there’s an ocean depth of satisfaction to discover. Still, many can get stuck in using the same old ways to stimulate the bean and miss out on a world of pleasure.

I’m Sofie Roos, a licensed sexologist, relationship therapist and author at Swedish sex positive magazine Passionerad. Whether you’re a complete newbie or seasoned pro, I’m here to help you show your clit some love.

Squeeze your legs together during strapping

If you’re into strapping and would like to cum during it, try squeezing your legs together. It can increase the friction against the external part of your clit and make the internal parts of the clit get stimulated. This is best to try in missionary with your feet up or during spooning.

Slightly lower your tempo before it gets too much

By slowing down when you’ve built up the tension, you can actually increase the satisfaction. So, don’t think that you must always start slow and go faster.

Try smaller and more precise movements 

Many women tend to do quite large movements while masturbating or stimulating a partner. But if you give smaller and more precise movements instead, you can create an “effective” stimulation that feels better!

Pro tip: When with a partner, it’s even more important that you communicate when doing smaller movements, as the risk of not hitting the right spot increases. 

Take control of your breathing

People tend to unconsciously hold their breath at times when getting clitoral stimulation. But actively breathing deep down into your stomach helps you get more enjoyment (and relaxation) in the moment.

Alternate between tensing and relaxing

Shift between tensing and relaxing your thighs, glutes and pelvic floor. This variation tends to enhance arousal. It will be even better if you try to sync it with your breathing.

Use warmth to boost sensitivity

By warming up your hands, taking a hot shower or cuddling up under a blanket, you can become more susceptible to pleasure as heat increases sensitivity. 

Masturbate with the shower beam

If you have a shower, you also have access to one of the best sex toys out there.

Set a temperature and a pressure you like, and then play around with the beam on your clit. If you have a massage setting then try that as well.

Further reading: How to create sex toys from items you have at home

Rub your bean with a bullet vibrator

Invest in a bullet vibrator, and use it as an extension of your finger. This means that you can do circles or rub it up and down against your sweet spot, all while it vibrates. I like this bullet vibrator from Rocks Off as it’s big enough to be used easily! 

Pro tip: If you find sex toys to be too intense, then try using them over your clothes or panties — that often gives a softer and smoother stimulation! 

Stimulate the sweet spot in doggy style

Many people tend to get on their back while having clitoral sex, both when engaging in solo pleasure and with a partner. By switching it up with doggy style, you get a whole new angle which makes a surprisingly big difference. 

Dry hump against something you have at home

Rubbing your magic button against something you have at home, such as a pillow, a stuffed animal or a partner’s leg, either with or without clothes on, is a technique that makes many women reach all the way thanks to the unique friction it creates. 

Lube up

Some might find this one to be basic and boring advice, but lube makes everything so much better and is underestimated by many, so invest in one and try it out — it’ll make a huge difference! 

Suck on the clit

If you’re with a partner and are giving oral sex, then try sucking gently on the clit — that’s a real game changer!

Have your partner sit in front of you

Lastly, I want to recommend an amazing sex position for great clitoral sex. You sit on your bum, and your partner sits in front of you between your legs while leaning back against your torso. From here, you can easily stimulate their clit while kissing them or touching their breasts.

101: A sapphic guide to getting better at going down on your partner 

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