Why Jojo Siwa is facing biphobic backlash during Pride Month
BY LAURA CLARKE, IMAGE BY ADRIRODRIFOTO
This Pride month, the bisexual discourse has reared its head once again, as queer pop stars Jojo Siwa, Billie Eilish and Fletcher have all hard-launched their new relationships with men. And, as with most things, the internet has opinions.
“Hanging my flag at half mast in memory of all the WLW we’ve lost to men this pride month” said one TikTok user, showing a lesbian flag flying low on their porch. Another tweeted: “First Fletcher then Jojo Siwa now Billie Eilish…. Pride Month is cancelled.”
From the response, you’d think the singers had come out as straight, renouncing their women loving identities entirely. In reality Siwa, who previously identified as a lesbian, now uses the term “queer”, while Eilish and Fletcher have spoken about their multi-gender attraction in the past.
So why is the queer community mourning these “fallen soldiers”? In a word: bimisogyny.
Bimisogny – the blend of biphobia and misogyny experienced by queer women and femmes – is responsible for the stereotype that bi+ women are secretly straight. The backlash to Siwa, Eilish and Fletcher paints a clear picture – for women, queerness must be continuously proven. (Unlike for men – who are swiftly labelled “gay” for a slightly-too-lingering look.)
It’s also apparent that people are sceptical when sexuality changes or evolves. Siwa’s journey from “pansexual”, to “lesbian” and then “queer” has been met with ridicule, with LGBTQIA+ folks claiming her new relationship to be a backslide, or betrayal.
Biphobic rhetoric is abundant when someone switches from a lesbian identity to bi, pan or queer, as with Siwa, but also vice versa. Singer Reneé Rapp came out as a lesbian in 2024 after previously identifying as bisexual. This personal journey fuelled many people’s “proof” that bisexuality isn’t real – that it’s simply a phase, a state of confusion, before one eventually realises they are gay.
It would seem that any criticism of changes in women’s sexualities boils down to the same argument: that bisexuality is the problem. It is seen as inherently transient, and therefore, inherently untrustworthy.
In reality, sexuality may change for a variety of reasons. I chatted with Libby who, like Rapp, previously identified as bi before coming out as a lesbian at 22: “I realised that I didn’t actually enjoy being with men.”
Libby’s realisation that she was a lesbian made her understand that “bisexual” was never an accurate label for her: “A friend introduced me to compulsory heterosexuality and everything sort of clicked into place.”
Libby’s journey isn’t unique, but it’s also not the only reason somebody may change labels. I also spoke with Sophie who, like Siwa, identified as a lesbian before switching to the word “queer”. However Sophie doesn’t feel like her time as a lesbian was any less authentic: “I 100% felt I was a lesbian for the time I identified that way – I was only interested in people who identified or presented as women.”
Sexuality, and the way we label it, can evolve and change for a number of reasons. I asked Mark Cusack – an expert in flexible sexuality and author of Fluid – about the “born this way” mentality we have toward queer identities: “Stating that all sexuality is set in stone from birth is inaccurate and invalidates fluid people’s experiences. This invalidation can lead to psychological harm as we try to force ourselves into artificial boxes.”
As for the outcry directed towards Siwa and other bi+ pop stars, Mark feels that bi+ people are often left out of queer communities as soon as they stray from queer-presenting relationships: “Many of us are told we are not ‘queer enough’ if we are in an M/F presenting couple.”
It seems that we, as LGBTQIA+ people, need to stop enforcing the very binaries that we have historically broken free of. For some, sexuality may be a lifelong subscription, but others are just taking it one month at a time.
Laura Clarke (she/they) is a sex & gender specialist and author. Her book – Step Bi Step: The Ultimate Guide For Bisexual, Pansexual & Queer Young People – comes out on the 18th September. You can purchase Step Bi Step here.
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