We spoke to the provider hoping to make divorces easier for everyone involved
BY ELLA GAUCI AND EMILY O’MULLANE, IMAGE BY GETTY
In 2022, there was the lowest number of divorces in the UK since 1971, and marriages were on average lasting longer than they had before. During the same year, there were only 525 civil partnership dissolutions, the lowest number recorded since 2010.
The decrease in these numbers is thought to have maybe been impacted by the introduction of the Divorce, Dissolution and Separation Act in 2022, which removed the concept of assigning blame in a divorce and meant couples could go through the process as joint applicants. It also introduced waiting periods for divorce settlements, which may have delayed proceedings.
By removing the necessity for “blame” to play a factor in divorce, couples are able to remove some of the hostility which can occur during divorce proceedings. We spoke to Anthony Syder, former mediator and current Divorce Specialist at amicable, to find out more about how companies like amicable can help with a divorce.
How effective are current support systems in addressing the needs of LGBTQIA couples? Do you think there are any gaps in this support?
This has been a growing area and thankfully there are more services available to provide support for all individuals including LGBTQIA couples. This is crucial because every couple is unique and it is important that legal systems and services recognise the human element to divorce and separation which is different to other areas of law. The heteronormative lens is limited, so it is crucial that as marriage and civil partnership laws have been updated our response to the break-up of those relationships keeps pace. We are seeing more therapeutic services for example that offer counsellors with LGBTQIA lived experience and services like amicable who have LGBTQIA divorce specialists who understand some of the unique challenges faced especially where co-parenting is concerned.
Can you explain the key legal differences between the dissolution of civil partnerships and divorces?
Now that we have a no-fault system, there are no significant differences between divorce and dissolution. Couples enjoy the same rights. Divorce and dissolution remain two different pieces of legislation, but the process and the principles that are considered (including those around finances) are the same. Some countries, however, do not recognise same-sex marriage, so this can be different for international same-sex families.
What resources are available for lesbian couples going through a divorce?
What support does amicable provide to LGBTQIA couples that you cannot find in other divorce services?
Unlike solicitors, amicable works with couples rather than individuals. This allows us to create family goals and solutions that prioritise children. We recruit and employ divorce specialists from LGBTQIA backgrounds with lived experience of diverse family types which gives us additional insight when considering creative solutions to family separation. All our specialists are experts in constructively resolving conflict and differences of opinion—our blogs and divorce podcast feature expert opinions from LGBTQIA commentators and personal stories from LGBTQIA couples.
Based on your experience, what advice would you give to queer couples who are struggling in their relationships and are unsure about divorce?
Being able to tell if a relationship is over and has irretrievably broken down versus the situation where you’re just “going through a bad patch” can be a difficult thing. Relationship breakdown is a process but not a linear one. It often involves a seesaw of feelings and emotions; attempts to leave and reconcile. It can be tricky to know how you really feel or when you have passed the point of no return. Confusingly, it is quite normal for partners to disagree about when and if the point of no return has been passed. The decision that a relationship is over and that you want to leave can feel especially complicated if there are children involved. Add financial considerations, fear and emotion into the mix and decisions become overwhelming. If you find yourself at this point, then our guide for how to know when it’s over and when to leave a relationship can be found here.
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